Haynesworth's Worth

Albert Haynesworth gets traded to the New England Patriots was the news I received while waking up from my peaceful slumber this morning. Now I do not claim to know a lot about football. Unlike other sports where I at least know solid strategy, I lack even that in football. BUT, what I do know is that I have lived in Washington, DC for 9 years. Yes, that I know. AND, I know that for the last two years, Albert Haynesworth has been the hometown villain for not living up to the money given to him, getting suspended for a few games, and then worst of all if true, getting arrested for sexual harassment.

So why in the world would the Patriots want him? I have no idea. Bill Simmons says it is a good gamble. If it were up to me, I would remove him from the NFL and throw him in the middle of the Gobi for a quick attitude change and a hard lesson on food management.

But until that type of punishment is deemed moral, I say this:

NO Albert, the world does not revolve around you, NO, Albert, you are not Michael Phelps, 12,000 calories a day is too much, and NO, Albert, you will not make me feel dirty for being a Pats’ fan.

P.S. (Love the P.S.) I can't even post a picture of him because it makes me feel physically ill, so in his stead, I'll leave you with someone I watched last night during the Man U. v. MLS All-Star blow-out. Ladies and gentleman, I give you my new man crush, Chris Smalling:

P.P.S. (REALLY love the P.P.S.) He's only 21. Score.